Friday Funnies 2016
- Thread starter findtim
- Start date
findtim
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friday night is Taco Night , max and I and the girls have whatever they want as my daughter doesn't like tacos.
so thus we like kidney beans, for the first time i bought dry beans which need to be soaked over night, so i ring my 87yo dad who's the split pea king and ask " if i soak 100gms , what gms will i end up with?" he says he doesn't know so he asks 85yo mum who swiftly replies "ask google"
got me
tim
so thus we like kidney beans, for the first time i bought dry beans which need to be soaked over night, so i ring my 87yo dad who's the split pea king and ask " if i soak 100gms , what gms will i end up with?" he says he doesn't know so he asks 85yo mum who swiftly replies "ask google"
got me
tim
Data Glasses
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Ha ha
johno69
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http://screencast.com/t/bVCOXxgyL
I had a laugh. Surely someone was smart enough to notice, or maybe they are ahead of the game
I had a laugh. Surely someone was smart enough to notice, or maybe they are ahead of the game
findtim
Top Contributor
just chilling out late friday night, need total distraction so youtube and "cutting down a tree" sounds good !
OMG, so people are just plan stupid.
here's a hint, if you ever have to cut down a tree taller then you and someone says " hang on i'll just get the video camera", then don't cut down the tree !
tim
OMG, so people are just plan stupid.
here's a hint, if you ever have to cut down a tree taller then you and someone says " hang on i'll just get the video camera", then don't cut down the tree !
tim
Honan
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Southerns Hutters sounds like a good idea and selling them online is definitely ahead of the game
http://www.carbethhutters.co.uk/
Data Glasses
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The neighbour asked why his Lemons never ripen? I replied because you have a Lime Tree .....
Data Glasses
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Walking past the car wash the other day I noticed that an Indian Gent was looking at me for some reason? I said "hello" and he replied "Is this yours" as he pointed to the Porsche that had just been washed ..........I was quite tempted to say yes and continue my "walk" in some comfort !
Data Glasses
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The keys would have been it, as the workers move the cars to get detailed, there is also a cafe in the complex so a lot of activity going on, this is why he considered me to be the owner. If only those car jackers know ....LOL
Data Glasses
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Went for another walk today, thought I saw the first of the Nukes, couldn't tell if it was Chinese or American? ... Turns out it was just a bird .....
findtim
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i LOVE travelling, so i flew to sydney today , visit my sister in the gong for the weekend, and go to agm monday the
one of the things i like best is PAYING ATENTION to changes..... new buildings, roads etc, new marketing....billboards shops etc, ideas, people, systems, service.
so i land, get my luggage, ring my sister and say i'll meet her at the pickup place, on the way a quick trip to the loo, so i wheel my bad in, TINY toilet space for an airport? and decide to just do a stand up wee in the cubical as its right there as i went in.
as i'm there i here a machine playing an advert, its for "panty liners" , i think geez they got that wrong, next second i hear 2 girls talking behind me, ohhhh stuff, i went into the ladies
ummm, not paying attention !
tim
one of the things i like best is PAYING ATENTION to changes..... new buildings, roads etc, new marketing....billboards shops etc, ideas, people, systems, service.
so i land, get my luggage, ring my sister and say i'll meet her at the pickup place, on the way a quick trip to the loo, so i wheel my bad in, TINY toilet space for an airport? and decide to just do a stand up wee in the cubical as its right there as i went in.
as i'm there i here a machine playing an advert, its for "panty liners" , i think geez they got that wrong, next second i hear 2 girls talking behind me, ohhhh stuff, i went into the ladies
ummm, not paying attention !
tim
Bacon Farmer
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Sacked for lewd behaviour before taking office? Hehe. Congrats Tim!
Scott.L
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Donald nips into his local bakery and bumps into Hillary.
As they enter the bakery, Hillary steals three jam doughnuts and puts them in her handbag.
She says to Donald, “See how clever I am?
The owner didn’t see anything and I don’t even need to lie.
I should really have won the election.”
Donald says to Hillary, “That’s the typical dishonesty you have displayed throughout your entire
life, trickery and deceit. I am going to show you an honest way to get the same result.”
Donald goes to the owner of the bakery and says,
“Give me a doughnut and I will show you a magic trick.”
Intrigued, the owner accepts and gives him a doughnut.
Trump swallows it and asks for another one.
The owner gives him another one.
Then Donald asks for a third doughnut and he eats
that, too.
The owner is starting to wonder where the trick is
and asks, “Where's the magic in that?”
Trump replies, “Look in Hillary’s handbag".
As they enter the bakery, Hillary steals three jam doughnuts and puts them in her handbag.
She says to Donald, “See how clever I am?
The owner didn’t see anything and I don’t even need to lie.
I should really have won the election.”
Donald says to Hillary, “That’s the typical dishonesty you have displayed throughout your entire
life, trickery and deceit. I am going to show you an honest way to get the same result.”
Donald goes to the owner of the bakery and says,
“Give me a doughnut and I will show you a magic trick.”
Intrigued, the owner accepts and gives him a doughnut.
Trump swallows it and asks for another one.
The owner gives him another one.
Then Donald asks for a third doughnut and he eats
that, too.
The owner is starting to wonder where the trick is
and asks, “Where's the magic in that?”
Trump replies, “Look in Hillary’s handbag".
Data Glasses
Top Contributor
LOL ^
